Monday, July 28, 2003

Yea!!.. I'm back among the employed !

July, 28, 2003
Well....I've gotta job !! The bummer is that it's not exactly the kinda job that I like....I'm working at HUDD, which is a distribution warehouse for Target and Wallmart as a forklift driver loading and unloading trailers full of merchandise.....YEE HAA!!! just what I like !! (sarcasm)...It's not quite the meaningful job that I've been searchin for....but again I've only got a couple more months anyway so it doesn't really matter huh ? The hours REALLY suck !! Fri, Sat & Sun - 12hr shifts from 7pm-7am. How does that REO Speedwagon go? You gotta "Roll with the Changes"...LOL !

Thursday, July 24, 2003

Tims Back!! LOL

Aug 20th, 2004
Adam & Kelly stayed the night. They stopped in around 9:00 and like within 20 minutes Kelly was crashed out on the love seat with Adam. I know they're going through some problems right now. I can sometimes see it in Kellys face when she has that worried look. I really hope they last. I worry bout them. Well...guess who showed up the other day ! Tim !!...yeeha ! (sarcasm). Jim, who's down in Columbia doing all his Navy Security stuff told Becky he better be out by the time he comes back...yikes !!!...It seems official...Sam will be moving in with Becky and the gang soon....She told me that Cindy knows but not yet Rusty........ooops !! Big Amanda's starting to show now, she's 4 months (i think ?) She's been getting sick alot lately. It's gonna be a long tedious 5 months

Sunday, July 13, 2003

Does money make the world go round?

Jul 13th,2003
I've got such a serious headache today...I know what it's from.....from drinking two big glasses of cola before going to bed....I think it's really hard on my kidneys cause I'll wake up the next morning, I'll feel them (both sides), and they'll be rock hard and really sore.
I was supposed to start the HUDD (distibrution warehouse for Wall-Mart and Target) job tonight.....BUT the manager (MR. Willie Butler, HUDD?) said they won't start the weekend night shift till the 19th.....great!!....kinda need the money NOW for that stupid parking ticket...uuuugggghhh !!! (plus Vicky & kev could use the money..Money...MONEY !!!)

Tuesday, July 8, 2003

Another day older - still contemplating

Jul 8th, 2003
It's been a month since I've turned 40....things really haven't gotten any better here in the fun house....Kevins' still workin his ass off and getting on Vickys butt about the budget. Tim is still being his self....he asked me the other day we should go out to the campground on the 19th while Kevins' sister Judy (and her 9 kids) come down for Adams wedding and staying in the Apt. Sounds greats Tim !!....BUT not with you...he's still his obnoxious self..all him..him..him Poor Amanda is going crazy..with everyone in the apt. The date has been moved up...possibly in August...I need to get life insurance and get a will written up first...still doing it at the beach though.

Hey....someone actually made ME laugh the other day...believe it or not me and the kids saw Brandie & Chelsea Sunday at the mall. Brandie was still her goofy/silly self smiling and being vocal as ever!. She was walking around being silly around the mall...gettin wierd looks from some people !(Got me in a real good mood )And Chelsea is still spoiled...we stopped into the alternative store Hot Topic, (all black/gothic stuff) and Chels saw a pair of pants she wanted to buy...BUT they were $56 BUCKS !!! Anyways Brandie was stressin out because the money that Chels had was meant for helpin out Rhonda for the week while Chelsea. Least to say I intervened and talked to Chelsea (who sat down, hunched her shoulders in and pouted like a little 8 year old !!) sheesh !! Anyway......Amandas hanging out at Brandies for a few days....scary huh !??! Just hope they don't get into anything bad. They're still good kids at heart though.

Thursday, July 3, 2003

A dads worst nightmare

July 3, 2003
Well…I’ve decided too go out Sunday afternoon….Oh…and guess what…dear ol dad just found out his daughter isn’t a virgin anymore !. Just $#%#$%$ great!!!....all the more reason to go away !! I had been going thru KeyKey logger…and found Amanda chatting with Brandie and read this…
| | --> I love VIN DIESEL!!!!! - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 22:56:46
I don't know
what was ur first time like?
it feels weird me asking u that
| | --> I love VIN DIESEL!!!!! - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 22:58:26
yeah it hurt me too...i was almost in tears
| | --> I love VIN DIESEL!!!!! - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 22:59:32

i need ur help brandie
i need to take a u test

| | --> I love VIN DIESEL!!!!! - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 23:00:22
a"you know"test

| | --> Chris - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 23:00:36

| | --> I love VIN DIESEL!!!!! - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 23:01:06
and i have no way to get one or anything
| | --> I love VIN DIESEL!!!!! - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 23:06:02
no not really
my first time was great
it just took some time to get use to it
we did it 3 times
| | --> Chris - Conversation <--> 02-Jul-2003, 23:24:00
i had to go throw up
That was the end of the don't know.

Tuesday, July 1, 2003

Confusion & frustration

Jul 1,2003
We've been here three ##%%@! months....I quit Blackhawk last month and have yet to find a decent job ! I filled out apps at City of Portsmouth (Dispatching)...Moran Towing of Virginia..City of Virginia Beach (Dispatching)...Wallmart..Cox Communications....Lowes......Haynes Furniture....even Farm Fresh..(for night stock...which they're NOT hiring for !)....PLUS to make things even more depressing...I see everyone around either hurt, lonely, mad, or stressed. Kevins overworked, Tim just sits on the couch, Amanda J. has been ever disconnecting herself from the family...(just waiting for the day say mentions the M word...I think Kevins expecting it), Lil Amanda has been doing nothing but sitting on the computer in her own lil world chatting away, and Kenny just sits in his lil world playing games.

It just seems nobody likes to spend time together anymore. I'm hoping if I leave maybe things will get better....hopefully. This has been going on in my mind for a long time...I've been thinking about going down to Va beach for a loooooong swim....(hopefully I'll find a good riptide to carry me away). If anyone does find out how it happens I don't want the kids to find out. I have to find a way to send e-mail at a time/day automated.
There are some things I would never change, my growing up years..I am sooo thankful for the parents I have....A dad (who wasn't even my biological father) who spent time with me, making it a ritual every Sat to go out to Dunkin Donuts and talk about anything. It was the fishing trips that we made to lake Castaic that I'd always remember...he'd always help me out reeling a fish in....My mom would always take the time to bring me to those ever important Kingdom Hall meetings (I see now how how much she loved me)
I've been soo lucky to have parents like that. And what a crappy son/brother I've been....I haven't talked to anyone in about 4 months...why?....I don't know...there's no real reason....I mean both Reanee' and Danielle are married, ahve families and seem to be real happy......I sooo much hope the best for them. ( I miss them/everyone soooo much it hurts)...and you know what the sad thing is ??.....I just blow them off....I don't know why. It's just hard for me to be around this lack of love....this "cooling off of the greater love" (Matthew 12?) that I just can't deal with it.